The Beauty and The Beasts of the Bayou

Living on the bayou has many pleasures.  This weekend, as I was sitting in my shop looking toward the bayou, I saw a beautiful axis deer.  Although the white tail deer are native and abundant to this area, the axis buck is not.  It probably belonged to someone that had exotic animals and they escaped during either Hurricane Rita or Ike. 


Every evening we are greeted by a dozen or more white tails awaiting the deer corn feeder to go off.
The red tail hawks can be routinely seen landing in the pasture to garner some tasty morsel.  Most evenings around dusk one or more great horn owls can be seen flying from tree to tree. 


The birds are plentiful.  Cardinals, bluebirds, mockingbirds, blue jays, hummingbirds and my favorite of the woodpeckers, the pileated woodpecker are present.




On occasion I have seen a gray fox, coyote, feral hogs and footprints of a "really big cat".


Squirrels, rabbits, turtles possums, raccoons and armadillos will make an appearance of a frequent basis.  A Texas rat snake was even responsible for blowing an electrical fuse to the main transformer.
A beautiful Sonoma Mountain king snake lives in my barn.  They are very colorful snakes, but, you gotta make sure they are "Red next to Black" before you admire them.


If you love nature, you will love living on Pine Island Bayou.

HOWEVER

With all of the beauty to observe, there are some drawbacks.  If you have ever felt the sting of a hundred fire ants biting you on the ankles, the evening bite of the marsh mosquito or a horsefly, you start to wonder about the beauty of nature's creatures.  The sting of a red wasp can last for hours and  then  itch for two days.  Just yesterday I was stung by a yellow jacket as I was trying to eradicate the nest it had made between the brick and siding at my front door.  My daughter once disturbed a bumble nest while mowing and had over fifty stings requiring a trip to the emergency room.  Cleaning up after Hurricane Rita, I was bitten by a copperhead snake. During certain times of the year you can be annoyed by little biting flies and gnats. 

Considering all of my encounters with Mother Nature on the Bayou, my worst encounter occurred 800 miles away on Lake Chickamauga outside Chattanooga, TN.  We were entertaining some new friends for a day of picnicking, water skiing and swimming.  I brought the boat up from the marina and tied it to the pier.  As I was walking to shore on the pier, I felt something buzz into my nose.

As it turned out yellow jackets had a nest under the pier.  One flew up my nose  and stung me inside the nose.  I don't think I have ever felt greater pain.  By the end of the day I was breathing out of my mouth.  If I hadn't been with family and friends, I would have probably laid down on the bank and cried. 

So if you think about the beauty of living on the bayou, you better be prepared for the little beasts as well.

The Bow Tie

After finishing college I went to work with DuPont in Chattanooga, Tennessee.  I accepted a job as a First Line Supervisor in the textile fibers.  The dress code was implied.  A short sleeve shirt and a tie.
Due to the safety regulations, the tie had to be tucked between the second and third button of the shirt.


My Dad had taught me how to tie a half and full Windsor knots when I was a teenager.  I preferred the full Windsor and can still tie a pretty mean knot. For fourteen years I wore a tie to work every day.  Upon transferring to the Beaumont plant, I continued to wear a tie to work.  The dress code was a lot more casual and eventually I quit wearing ties.  Today I rarely wear a tie and like not doing so.


But, my story is about a bow tie.  During my college years I had many occasions to wear a tuxedo. Since my Dad and I were similar in size, he bought a tux that both of us could wear and not have to rent one for every wedding or formal occasion.  My Dad wore bow ties most of the time.  He refused to wear the "clip-on" type and tied his own ties.  Every time I had to wear a tux, my Dad would tie my tie. 


At one point in my senior year of college, I was in a wedding in Houston.  I took the tux along with all of the accessories with me.  It was not until the night before the wedding that I realized I did not know how to tie a "bow tie"   None of the people, adults included, that were  around, knew how to tie it.  All I remembered was Pop mentioning that you tie one just like a shoe string.  So, after the reception, I stayed up most of night practicing.  It was a lot harder than the full Windsor.


I finally got an acceptable knot.  Only problem it was a little crooked.  Fortunately, the bride was beautiful and no one cared about my tie.


Today, I am an expert at putting on a clip on bow tie.

Is There Algebra in Baseball

If you have read more than one of my blogs, then you know that I am a huge baseball fan.  Today you can watch multiple games on TV at almost any given time.  The basics of the game are still basically the same.  The presentation, marketing, analysis and a plethora of talk shows are new, but nothing beats the excitement of the game itself.




I prefer attending games in person.  However, watching the action on TV can be very entertaining.
But, radio broadcasts hold a special place in my heart.  It all started listening to the local minor league team on my crystal set.  As a result I have become fond of radio baseball analysts.


My three favorite radio baseball men of all time are:


1. Ed Dittert.  Among other sports, I best remember him for his late night play by play of the Beaumont Exporters in the 1950's.  He made me feel  like I was in the stadium with the Knot Hole Gang.


2. Loel Passe.  He was the Houston Colt .45s/Astros color guy in the 1960's.  He was a "homer" and full of enthusiasm.  I can still hear him shouting, "Now you chuckin' in there, Turk"


3. Harold Mann. The voice of Lamar University.  I always catch his radio broadcasts whenever, I can't be in the stadium.  On occasion he will give me a shout out.


As I was driving to work this morning listening to Harold and another radio guy talk about teachers having to take Texas History in order to teach in the State, when the subject shifted to Algebra.  My radio guy adulation suddenly screeched to a halt when both agreed that Algebra was useless and no one ever used it.  Well, Harold, this is a little baseball algebra for you.


Mathematician, Bill James, thoroughly analyzed baseball statistics to better measure and value players performance.  Billy Beane put the sabermetrics to practice with his Oakland A's.  How do you value performance? Is it Batting Average, RBIs, home runs, etc. Some people suggest that the most telling stat is OPS.  So, Harold and Jim Love, here is some Baseball Algebra for you.


OPS (Y) = OB%(X) + SLUG%(Z)


Variables:


T=At Bats                                          h=total hits (s+d+t+r)
s=singles                                            w=walks
d=doubles                                           p=hit by pitch
t=triples                                              f=Sacrificed Flies
r=home runs (aka round trippers)
Y = X + Z


Y =   h+w+p                   s+2d+3t+4r           
        T+p+f+p        +              T




Therefore,


Y = T*(h+w+p)+(s+2d+3t+4r)*(T+w+f+p)
                             T*(T+w+f+p)


A couple of Lamar U. examples.


Mike Ambort(LU single season HR record)           2005  OPS = 1.068
Erik Kanaby(LU single season batting avg record  2006   OPS =   .876


So, Harold, take this algebra to the air waves!

No Rehab For Stupid

I was watching one of the late night talk shows when Chris Rock was a guest.  The discussion centered around celebrities doing awful things and claiming they either had a drug, alcohol or sex addiction.  Once they went to rehab all was forgiven like nothing ever happened.   Rock commented that since he didn't drink, smoke dope or any other harmful diversion, he was in trouble.  Because, he said, "There ain't no rehab for 'Stupid'".





My corollary for that would be, "Ignorance and incompetence ain't against the law"!  So, why do some local institutions continue to hang on to obviously poor performing employees. 

Are they the  ignorant ones?




A good employer owes it to his good people to deal with ineffective, poor performers and not wait for them to be convicted of a crime. 


The efficient should not be punished by the recalcitrant few.

Dress Code

The best thing about retirement is the dress code.  I have always been at my highest comfort level in a pair of Wranglers and boots.  Today I have subsituted New Balance running shoes for the more manly footwear, but the jeans and occasional bib overalls are my staple attire.

Since retiring, I have been to several weddings and funerals. Jeans and an occasional sport coat suit me just fine.  I think the secret to adhering to the "Retirement Dress Code" is being comfortable in your own skin.  I really don't care what others think. As long as my apparel is clean, what difference does it make. 

However, there has been one situation that I broke the code.  It was under extreme pressure that I folded.  My daughter had received a prestigious teacher's award and I was invited  (and expected) to attend.  Jeans were NOT an option.  Attending was!  I didn't even own a suit.  Being "cheap" I didn't want to spend money on something I would wear only once.  Twice, if you count my funeral. 

After finally accepting that it was my daughter's feelings that were at stake, not mine, I bought a new suit.  I tried the Goodwill store, but they had nothing in my size. I even got some black socks and some "pimp-looking" shoes to go with it.  I even got a hair cut.

I was a great night, but, my feet hurt the entire time.